Use the ‘Let Them Theory’ to level-up your artwork

*“Let Them” and “Let Me”:* A Mindset Shift for Working Artists

As artists, it’s easy to get caught in the comparison trap. You scroll through Instagram, seeing someone else’s sold-out show, a gallery signing a new artist, or a peer landing a dream residency — and suddenly, your own work feels smaller, less significant. It’s a gut-punch moment we all know too well.
But what if I told you there’s a mindset shift that can free you from this cycle — and actually help you become a better artist?

The Let Them concept was originally penned by Cassie Phillips. Mel Robbins turned the concept into a best-selling book, strangely without credit to Phillips. As artists, we understand the importance of giving credit where it’s due, and I want to acknowledge Phillips as the true author of this powerful idea. While the mindset still holds deep value, it's essential to recognize and support original voices. More about this here. Now that we’ve acknowledged this, we can learn how the concept can help us.

Let Them: Releasing Control

In the art world, you will come across people who don’t support your work, curators who pass on your submissions, and artists who seem to sprint ahead while you’re still finding your rhythm. The “let them” theory invites you to release control of these moments.

Didn’t get invited to a group show? Let them curate how they want.
A fellow artist is posting constant success stories? Let them celebrate their wins.
A collector overlooked your painting for someone else’s? Let them choose what speaks to them.
A peer artist has an absolutely beautiful website? Let them have the online presence that suits them.

This isn’t about passivity — it’s about acceptance. Other people’s decisions reflect their tastes, their journeys, their timing — not your worth or talent.

When you stop trying to control how others perceive you or your art, you remove the emotional weight of rejection and comparison. And that creates space for something much more important: your own growth. This also gives us the opportunity to evaluate what you really want. For instance, are you jealous of that artist’s gorgeous website because you want the same thing for yourself? Upset that they got into a juried show because you were rejected? These clues can help you narrow down what areas to improve upon. And - it’s all within your reach!

Let Me: Reclaiming Your Power

Once you “let them” be who they are, the focus shifts to you — your art, your goals, your focus.

Didn’t get invited to a juried show? Let me get some professional help before I send out my next show proposal.
Someone else’s artwork is making you feel like yours is lacking? Let me use that as motivation to take some classes and try some new techniques.
Outdated online presence? Let me put some effort into fixing up my website and social media. (Don’t forget - theirs looks great because they took the time and put in the effort - and you can do it too!)

The “let me” mindset is about stepping back into your power. It’s a reminder that your creative journey doesn’t rely on someone else's validation — it’s driven by your own commitment to showing up and making art, again and again.

My Own Experience with “Let Them” and “Let Me”

Just like everyone else, I’ve found myself comparing my business to others in the past. And since my business is so niche, I don’t even have that many direct comparisons! So what happens? I start comparing myself to people in wildly different fields — people with different goals, audiences, and paths. Suddenly, I’m measuring my success against someone’s social media following, their brand image, or how many likes their latest post got. It’s all too easy to fall into that trap when everything is presented neatly in a grid.

But here’s the shift: when I stop paying attention to all of that noise, when I truly focus on “let me,” something incredible happens. I take ownership of my own success. I pour my energy into my work, my ideas, and my path forward. This mindset shift has been a game-changer for me. I began to see clearly down the path that suits me best, and opened up the mental space to be creative with my business ideas.

How This Transforms Your Art

The most incredible thing happens when you stop comparing and start creating with this new mindset: your art improves.

Why? Because instead of wasting energy worrying about others, you reinvest it into your work. You experiment more freely, take risks, and build a practice rooted in authenticity. The noise quiets, and the focus sharpens.

You begin to ask yourself:

What excites me in the studio today?
How can I push this idea further?
What story am I telling with my art?

The art world will always be full of noise — openings, awards, and sales that can make you feel like you’re in a never-ending race. But the real magic happens when you step back and say: